Burger Party Chez Chef Ciccio

Two weeks ago as the summer weather was at times almost unbearable, with the sun, heat, humidity and mosquitoes mercilessy making a meal out of your sweaty body, we also as humans feasted on our fellow living things.

We started preparing things early in the afternoon, first of all getting quality meat in from the butchers in the countryside, then placing it in a bowl with a couple of eggs for texture.

We then added fresh herbs and spices picked straight from the host's garden, which is well stocked in all the seasonings you might need for a good barbecue, sage, rosemary, parsley and other stuff.

The fresh herbs once brought back in the kitchen were then washed and chopped, then thrown in with the meat mix in the bowl.

The next step was to bring some human energy in the mix, get the hands dirty and make some nice meat mix to make decent burger pattys with.

A few beers were opened and the process continued as we were on to make some very decent burgers not just your average ones you can buy.

So what's even better than beer and beef, which we already had?

Pussy some of you might say, but the real men would only have an option really, the master race of meats, the emperor of grease and fat, our lord and saviour:

BACON. yes.

It was a simple straightforward choice anyway, so we started frying some pancetta in the pan, pancetta is basically Italian for bacon, it comes in different cuts and is often diced.

That's exactly what we needed as we didn't want to simply place bacon strips on our burgers once they were made, we wanted the bacon to be an integral part of our burger patty, its caring soul.

Here's our lovely bacon cooking in the pan, smelling up the room with goodness.

Next we started peeling and cutting onions, as they are an obvious add on in any burger, at the same time we started cutting Provolone cheese in slices and getting the Gorgonzola(like blue Stilton) out of the fridge.

Provolone melts amazingly, one of the best types of cheese to add on steaks or burgers, while the Gorgonzola packs quite a strong taste and goes well with fried onions.

Now it was time to actually press up the meat to make the pattys, for that we used some food proof paper to keep the pattys separated, a round metal pot to give the burgers their shape and a heavy glass to press everything together.

Here's the process basically, place a layer of paper at the bottom of the metal pan, then put a pile of meat mixture, then place another sheet of paper on top of it. Then apply pressure using the glass.

Here's our Chef Ciccio making them burgers, I was just drinking beer and taking photos while he was working like an eight year old Chinese child in a shoe factory. Industrial grade handmade burgers.

That's the first batch of the production line, there were going to be lots of mouths to feed that night so the we just kept on pressing and piling them up.

That's the kitchen work done, now out to the garden to get the grill ready, as people were arriving and were hungry we slammed the fuckers on and got cooking.

The grill was powered by wood logs on fire, which actually gave the burgers a nice natural smoky flavour, that's some properly flame grilled burgers right there, miles better than store bought.

That's a good view of the flames heating up the grill, with burgers, onions and cheeseburgers all cooking up nice, we also placed the sliced buns on the grill so they would warm up nice.

The finished product obviously turned quite nice and tasty, we also had sliced tomatoes and salad for those who wanted to them in, that's what they looked like when they were assembled.

The mosquitoes and the heat and humidity were still bad all throughout the night, but the beer, burgers and company made it all better.

Pa ra pa pa pa, I'm loving it.

Also, this creature somehow sneaked into the property and was spotted feeding at our table, its origins are unclear and it is not yet established whether it belongs to the human specie or not. As the photo evidence clearly shows it is likely to be some type of gnome commonly found in caves, who was attracted by the smell of food.

Roasted Bruschetta Sandwich

Today the impossible has happened.

I have actually eaten healthy.

So some of you might be familiar with what a Bruschetta is, right?

A slice of roasted bread, with some olive oil, oregano and tomato on top.

Not difficult to make, but still a bit dull.

So what did we do here to make things a bit better.

Well first of all we got ourselves some decent Italian bread, this is called a "crocodile" by the baker, due to its shape, nice and was baked in a wooden oven.

Then we got some actual mozzarella cheese, good quality is essential here too.

Then we got some oregano(dried) and some fresh basil leaf, which I picked from the plant I have outside on my terrace.

We then proceeded with putting some olive oil, extra virgin, just like a World of Warcraft player on top of the bread, then added some sliced mozzarella and some oregano on top. Put this in an oven in grill mode to let the cheese melt and the bread brown a little.

That's what we ended up with, nice toasted bread, with slighly melted cheese on top, oregano and basil to add a little of that Mediterranean flavour people in Islington pay nine quid for.

Here is with the addition of a few olives, as olives are always good.

Better view of our work:

Now we just have to get the other slice of bread covered in melted cheese and we're almost done.

We're almost done, a few tweaks and our quick meal is ready

Now it's elementary stuff, but the melted cheese side on top and enjoy your sandwich.

Yep that's it, doesn't excessively good, but I enjoyed it and it has been a nice break from bacon!

See you next time, hopefully lard and pork will feature more...

Pimp my Pizza

So the basic thing here is taking an average dull frozen pizza and turn it into something you can proudly chug down with a few beers over a football game.

You know the bad thing about food here in Italy? The problem is we don't have any Hungry Man snacks, no Hot Pockets, no Subways, no Taco Bells, no Wendys, no White Castle, not even any Quiznos.

We are basically supposed to be eating olive oil and tomatoes and whatever else that is healthy and won't clog your arteries. But I rebel to that!

I'm not gonna submit to this country and its eating habits.

So let's the what's our basic ingredient:

That's a frozen pizza available here in Europe, best on the market when it comes to value for money, that's the mushroom one, the only edible of the serie as the others have shite like tuna on them.

Okay so now what we need is some goodness, and what do you think of when you think about something that's good and pink?

Bacon obviously, here it is:

So now we just have to fry our piggy goodness on a pan for a bit, until it cooks

At the same time we should be getting some proper mozzarella sliced up so we can add it to our pizza

This is our pizza in the oven out of the box, with no additions

Now let's add some yummy bacon, looks much better already

Let's have a better look at the bacon, looks so gorgeous and sexy on the pizza base, so crispy yet so delicate, the food of the goods and the alcoholics of this planet(yes there are gods among us, haven't you watched Thor yet?)

Cheese attack! Let's slam some damn mozzarella on that thing, now I'm talking about proper mozzarella from Italy, she melts and she's a beauty, there you go.

I did burn a little bit the edges but it was all good. I then doused it in Green Jalapeno Tabasco sauce and Encona Hot Pepper, my two favourite hot sauces.

Well people, bon appetit!

And by the way I actually ended up eating it with grapefruit juice, now some of you might be aware of its liver enzyme inhibiting abilities, which all help in certain situations, but I'll leave it here.

Baconator Chili Toast Blast-Sunny Sunday Version

Okay so here we go for this majestic culinary creation you will need:

-Bacon
-Cheese that melts nicely
-Fresh tomatoes
-Mexican Kidney Beans
-Parsley
-Toast Bread
-Cumin
-Coriander
-A mixed spice powder with chili, garlic, cumin, paprika, dried onion, etc.

So thats's our spice mix, all sourced in either India or the next local supermarket

Then we chop the fresh parsley leafs and the tomatoes and slam them in a frying pan together with the Mexican kidney beans. Then we add spices to taste. I like to go a little but heavy with the cumin but show restraint with the coriander/cilantro that had the tendency of overpowering other flavours a bit.

Now that's our tomatoes cooking up nice with the beans  and the flavourings.

At the same time you should baconating with dedication:

Thats's my bacon of choice, it's good, in strips and the brand shares a name with a famous Italian firearm manufacturer, and we all knows guns are at least as cool as bacon.

 That's some Raschera cheese next to our beloved bacon, they go well together Italy's finest.

Bacon strips cooking up nicely as they should. Dammit!

Nows let's get to the assembling part, first of all let's get our toast ready:

Next step will be unloading the tomato and bean mixture onto the toast with dead accuracy, as we don't tolerates failure round here.

Okay so now we're slowly getting there, just need to make everything nicely fit on that toast, now we add our bacon.

It's starting to look yummy! Ain't it? Brap

Now let's add more BACON

Now that's more like it, I had some extra bacon cooking so I just slammed the fucker onto that. I knows it looks good, but it's not done yet.

Side view of our lovely creation, just for the artistic factor!

That's like porn, pussy or bacon, the choice is yours, at least one is always warm, welcoming and never smells like an open air fish market on a warm sunny summer day. Am I right lads?

MAJESTIC:

Close up of our creation:

So nows that's almost finished, all we need is some melted cheese and then we're home free.

Okay now let's put this in the oven and let fucker melt.

Wow looking orgasmic ain't it? Wonderful, we're almost done, nows all the flavours would have mixed nicely with each other, the spices, everything.

What we have here is by far the pimpiest cheese on toast ever made, future generations will use this as guideline for the food making process of a hybrid of humans and robots that will over take humanity and force the global population on a diet of bacon.

In case you haven't noticed that looks yummy as fuck, have another peek

Ready to be eaten by me:

Final pic of my lovely creation, marvelous creation I might add

Hope you enjoyed my cooking blog today, with nice ingredients, a taste for grease and enough beer and stuff in your system you should never underestimate your culinary creativity. Keep your mind open, try different combinations, experiment. If you want to be on the front line of food making, dig yourself in a trench of bacon and hold your own against haters and nay-sayers.

Keep it real to the max. Peace bruvs.